Bad doctrine and the culture war have combined to frustrate many godly Christian women in their desire for a husband. The bad doctrine is not just an inherited thing that is ignorantly perpetuated by well-meaning leaders and theologians, it is intellectually protected by these men even when they have been shown the truth, such is the lack of character in our civilization – this a major cause of the crisis we find ourselves in. The culture war is between the culture of Scripture and the culture of baptized feminist humanism.
WORLD magazine’s article Single and stuck? highlights the problem of those women who were raised as god-fearing Christians wanting marriage but stuck in singleness. They want to fulfill the normal desire of every young girl to have a husband and a family. But where are the faithful righteous men that are supposed to come calling asking father for their hand, competing to rescue them from a life of barren singleness? Sadly, they cannot look to Scripture because, seemingly, the question is not addressed there.
Where in Scripture is the role model of the single woman who finds herself without a husband? You would think there would be at least one godly woman somewhere in Scripture who finds herself in an age of apostasy (of which there were plenty in the Israel of Bible times) with few prospects of ever finding a faithful, godly, single man? Even WORLD asks, “But what if there are more Christian women desiring to be married than there are men wanting to be married?”
It seems God has missed something here. Either that or we have.
Let’s look at this logically for a moment: God commands us to be fruitful and multiply. God makes you a woman in today’s world. You want to obey God and reap the blessings of that obedience – a husband to obey, serve, and have as a covering protection, and children to raise for God’s kingdom. But there are no godly single men to be had. We then must ask, “Is God providing, as a Provident God, a way to obey Him?”
Of course. God is a loving God who has provided a way, demonstrated in His Word, shown in creation, practiced by His saints, and provided for in every place and every time in history. What is unusual about our particular view of Scripture is that we have, theologically and culturally, decided that we know better than God how marriage should be defined, what constitutes right and wrong, and who our source of law should be, and what parts of His Word we will and will not take seriously. This all makes it hard for us to look to His Word when looking for answers because we have, a priori, discounted His providential order for marriage as irrelevant to us.
God is, in fact, very pro-marriage and has provided a godly husband for every godly woman who wants one. Only the one He has provided for you might just not be single. The very best ones are not. They have proved themselves to be godly men by the fruit of their lives. They obey and teach others to obey God’s law. They are faithful to their wives and give them loving leadership, expecting their wives to submit to them as they submit to God’s LawWord. They are Christ like in their faithfulness to God and in their kindness to the needy and strangers, orphans and widows. If they know God’s law and obey it they will also be willing to take more than one woman under their wing.
Yes, under God’s law, any woman can have any man for a husband, so long as they are equally yoked. All men are available. All women under 60 years of age are expected to be married and serve God by serving a husband. All women who can have children are expected to be married and obey the command to be fruitful and multiply.
To the unintentionally single girls: Thus for you to find a good husband you must be able to discern which ones are obeying God’s LawWord and which ones just talk a good line, telling you what you want to hear. To discern which is which you must become a student of God’s LawWord. When you have spent a year or two reading and studying Biblical Law let your father know and tell him to contact the man you can then recognize as a godly man.
To the fathers of unintentionally single girls: You have a part to play in helping your daughters fulfill the command of God to be fruitful and multiply. A godly daughter will remain under your authority until you transfer that authority to a godly man. She should not have to do this alone. You are better equipped to tell a rotter from a godly man. Look around: has God provided a good man for your daughter? And do not rule out a man just because he is already married. And do not waste too much more time. And provide her with a dowry and ask for a bride price (negotiable). A good man will not balk at this.
To the would be suitors of unintentionally single girls: Its time to exercise your sanctification and get in good spiritual shape for the challenge of being a true believer of YHVH in a apostate age. There is no culture of belief around you to teach you the ongoing validity of God’s LawWord. But you have the Scriptures and there are able teachers available if you search for them.
This article makes some powerful assertions as to the nature and doctrine of marriage. Are they backed up by Scripture? Dark spiritual forces in our culture have cowed just about every Biblical scholar and teacher for some time on this issue, but not Tom Shipley. That is why I consider him to the most important man alive today. With his book, “Man and Woman in Biblical Law,” Tom has pierced the heart of humanism (feminism) with the Torah of YHVH. Hallelujah!